Mental Health & Wellness & College
Let me start with this disclaimer: I don’t have the training, knowledge, or background to offer brilliant ideas about mental health and going to college. But I am certain it needs to be brought up so here we go.
Based on what I can see TODAY, it looks like this fall will be the first full-blown return to campus/college life since March of 2020. That’s 2.5 years, folks. Some students got barely a year and a half into high school and did the rest online. Some graduated virtually, too. Those students are going off to college this fall.
Others didn’t have proms, football games, or Friday night outings. Some REALLY struggled academically trying to do high school online. In spite of all the daily complaining about how high school s——, teenagers are social creatures, and the Covid-19 pandemic denuded their social experiences. While it took a toll on all of us, I have come to believe it stole critical growth opportunities for our students.
We talk just about everything BUT our mental well-being. We post minutiae on social media constantly, but we don’t let ourselves show others where we are struggling. We find it very difficult to be this vulnerable in our role as parents. Yet, it could be a life-saving conversation with your student.
So, my only piece of advice is this: Raise it with them before they leave.
One thing I know to be true- we DON’T know what we don’t know. If you are depressed, that may be your normal. If you are struggling with bad thoughts, you may not know there is help for that. If we don’t know what good mental health IS, we don’t have a way to say this isn’t it and I need some help.
I believe we should speak about that to our students before we send them off to college. We must say that the stresses of going to a new place, doing school differently, finding new friends, etc. may cause us to get overwhelmed. There’s homesickness, but then there’s spiraling depression.
Let them know you will listen. Let them know they can tell you their truth. Tell them it is okay AND smart to seek professional medical help if they can’t move forward from a low place. Make it clear you are a safe place for whatever is overwhelming them.
Parents, be extra vigilant and sensitive to this issue. This fall, the entering class of students had the life-altering Covid experience as THEIR high school experience. It impacted a large cohort of students nationwide, and we are still decoding that impact on our families.
I have heard from a number of parents that their student is not as mature as they should be. I believe that’s because Covid denied them opportunities to do the things that help us grow up. Things like part-time jobs, clubs & organizations, social outings & trips. All these things help us learn how to work with others, develop our interpersonal skills, and make a series of small decisions that help us do better with the bigger ones.
If things aren’t okay, let’s make sure your student knows YOU want to know. Then, you move the mountains to get them the help they need. When you are in a dark place, you can’t do it by yourself. It takes their village to come and lift you up.
Until Next Time,
All My Best,
Bonnie Burkett
